Where We Are
Cyndi, who is usually is offering up bands and music, this time just laments where we are in the midst of Covid, and likewise the road ahead.
A weird thing has been happening to me and maybe some of you have noticed it in yourselves, too.
Once vaccinations started and numbers began coming down, I got really hopeful and happy. Initially I felt like, wow, we might get our lives back and see each other again- music, art, all of it. I was on a happy high after my second vaccine. I felt great with Biden pushing to get the vaccine program moving. I watch the numbers everyday and I’m so relieved that it appears this pandemic is starting to lose its hold.
Then something else began happening… I found myself realizing the impact of the last year and how we are all different now. Friends have not seen each other in over a year. People are lost to us forever. Clubs have closed. Bands have just disbanded ( or strengthened, as mine has) but we are different. We have all changed regardless.
For one thing, I have lived a very different life style. My nights and my habits have changed very much. I’m healthier, fitter, stronger. Late nights and partying were replaced with workouts and dance classes. My business took a hard hit that made me question everything that I faced losing and how much I would be changed by that and/or if those things were my life or just things in my life. Then I rethought my life completely. Who you love, what you love, what really matters.
We are all forever changed by traumas and awakenings from this pandemic. Life was not about filling my calendar with gigs or how many times we got played on the radio – it was about surviving to see my daughter maybe one day have children of her own.
It was making music with people I realized are the only people I can make music with if I had to pick them as if life depended on it and appreciating the magic they create out of an idea. It’s about realizing that radio is about sharing us all and not highlighting me.
That everyone is part of the preservation of music and art, and will fight for that even in their basements and living rooms. That our pets kept us sane during this pandemic and the loss of so many really was heartbreaking for many of you – having just gone through that myself not that long ago – I feel you, I hurt for you. The loss of people directly or indirectly from Covid- we have all gone through so much this past year that we really are forever changed.
And that’s kind of scary.
What will we make of this after it gets behind us more and more?
What do we take with us and learn from it?
Many of you made a huge difference in my life the past year- from giving me your hearts during your online performances or just a phone call to see how the bar was doing ( the financial losses became the last thing I cared about after the initial closings – my friends killing themselves from loss was devastating.)
I want you to know how much I appreciate those friends who took the time to use this time to do good things. To be more human during ugly times. Those who were on front lines at hospitals and dr offices and who swabbed our noses and pricked our arms. Regardless of your own risk. That was sexy.